First post

2/07/08 Friday

After reading several blogs online over the last week or so, Ive felt compelled to start one myself. The main purpose of this blog is to circulate information pertaining to my Mom's fight with melanoma. How she is feeling, what the doctors are saying, and details about her treatment will be the news that I will try to relate so to keep family and friends up to date on everything that is happening. As I try to document the things going on with Mom, I know my thoughts, feelings, and emotions will be going crazy. It has already started to happen. And while my aim is to make this blog more historical in nature, it will inevitably become very personal to me. I dont know how this blog will really go. I've never written a blog before ....and I've never had to deal with watching a super close loved one, the one who gave birth to me, face a brutal, deadly disease.



To the facts. How we got here. A quick run down.

Soon after Christmas, Mom started to have discomfort in her stomach. From New Years on, her abdomen started to fill with fluid. Her stomach started getting bigger. The pain increased. She was having trouble sleeping. She said, "I look and feel like Im pregnant. It feels like Im having contractions.

1/26/08, Sat—Cat Scan indicates metastasis (spread of disease). This is the first time I really even considered the possibility she had cancer.

1/27/08, Sun—Shan, my sister, along with my seven month old nephew, Nate, arrive from California.

1/28/08, Mon --Mom's primary physician is shuffling her feet. It seems like she really doesnt know what to do or where to go. We dont either. We are all in shock and scared. While at work, I ask a couple of people, "If you thought your mom had cancer, what would you do?" Tim, a friend and collegue of mine, reminded me of how a good, mutual friend, Scott, expedited the process of getting an appointment for his wife to see the doctor a few months prior. Scott is the Vice President of Operations for Norton's Healthcare. How stupid I was not to immediately think of Scott. My brain either operates two days slower than the norm, or it is still in complete shock, and not functioning properly yet. I called Scott, and within a few hours we had an appointment for tomorrow to see Dr. Stevens, head of oncology at Norton's.

1/29/08, Tues—Mom has her stomach tapped at Baptist East. Three Liters of fluid is extracted. Mom feels 100% better. She looks so good and feels so good, it is truly hard to believe something wrong is going on in her body. We go meet Dr. Stevens at Suburban. Things are serious. Terms like nodules and spots are used, instead of tumors and cancer, but we all understand what He is saying. Mom is in trouble. He admits her into the hospital to facilitate tests getting done, so we can really find out what is going on, and what kind of cancer we are dealing with.

Mom is in tremendous spirits. I cant tell if she grasps exactly how bad the news is or if she is in complete shock. Mom always looks at the glass half full. She is the eternal optimist. I love that about her. It is one of her strongest qualities. I remember reflecting on how important that is going to be over the next few months --staying positive. I could already tell, staying positive, would be harder for me than it would be for her. We go to WW Cousins for lunch before Mom is admitted. She was craving french fries. I was so nervously hungry, i ate two huge burgers-probably a 3000 calorie lunch.

We go back to Suburban and Mom gets admitted. We have a nice private room. We needed it because a lot of people care about Mom. It was full to capacity the whole time she was there. Mom gets tests done over the next 3 days. Every blood test and scan known to man.

1/30/08, Wed---We go to Rafferty’s for lunch. Myself, Jenn (my wife), Shan, Nate, Julie (Mom's niece), Steph(Mom's niece), Berry (my dad, Mom's ex) are all there. We are all waiting anxiously for my sister, Sarah, to arrive later on that night. She has been overseas on a mission trip since September and is flying in from Africa. Sarah finally arrives around 10pm. We all have good prayers and conversation with Mom before we leave the hospital for the night.

1/31/08, Thurs---We get some tests back. I cant remember exactly which ones. Maybe the Pet Scan. Tests seem to indicate Peritoneal Carcinoma. That would be consistent with her largest tumor in her abdomen, and all the fluid that is building up in that area. Myself, Sarah, Shan, Steph, Christy (friend), all go to lunch at Café Lou Lou’s. I've been calling Teddy (friend) to research Peritoneal Carcinoma for me via the internet. He reads me some horrible sounding articles. I use Sarah's labtop to read more when we get back to the hospital. Nothing sounds good about the disease. There doesnt seem like there are any good treatments out there and survival past 12-16 months is rare. I am devastated and break down in front of Mom, Shan, Steph, and Sarah. So far we know Mom has tumors in her abdomen (peritoneal), on her kidney, bladder, lungs, behind her sternum, and her spine, and on her liver. As well as several bumps on her side and back that you can feel. The spots on her liver and spine are the most troubling to me.

2/01/08, Friday ----Biopsy results. Dr. Stevens informs us Mom has stage IV melanoma. Melanoma sounded better than Peritoneal Carcinoma, maybe because we had all heard of melanoma. But being a stage IV case, it really isnt. We were all in shock for a second time. We prayed and cried together. Mom remains as strong as ever. Dr Stevens has scheduled an appointment for her at the Brown Cancer Center with Dr. Don Miller for Tuesday. Mom is released and we go to lunch at Cheddar's (Mom's Aunt, Ann Pittenger, whom I call Sissy, eats lunch with us too). Later on, Mom, Sarah, Shan, Nate, and Steph came over to our house and we played Wii and Guitar Hero. My kids, Luke(12), Jake(9), and Jaclyn(6) love playing games with their Gig (Mom's nickname).

2/02/08, Saturday –Went to Mom’s and had Impellizerri’s pizza and looked at old photos. The photos are randomly scattered around in a plastic bin. Her organizational genetics run true in my case. We all have fun making fun of each other in the pictures. A very good time.

2/03/08, Sunday –Shan flew home early in the morning.

2/05/08, Tuesday---Took Mom, Sarah, and Steph to Waffle House before the appt. Went to appointment at the Brown Center. Met Dr. Miller and Dr. Chesney. Decided on Biochemotherapy treatment with Digoxin. She is planned to be admitted on Monday for her first cycle of treatment. Five straight days. Took everyone to Ditto’s for lunch. Jan met us there. Went to Del Frisco’s for dinner. I ate as much as possible because the next day was the start, and initial weigh in for the "biggest loser" competition at work. The person who loses the greatest percentage of body weight wins $2000. The next day I weighed in at 216, after drinking a gallon of water right beforehand.

2/07/08, Thurs—Mom has her stomach tapped a second time at Baptist East. 3 more liters of fluid extracted. Mom feels a lot better again. Only a week and half from her first tapping. Her stomach filling up so fast is worrying me. I also can't get her "spot" on her liver out of my mind. From everything I've read, metastasis to the liver and brain are the most serious. I cant pray enough.

2/08/08, Fri--I went over to Mom's house after work. We had a serious, but good talk. I opened up to her about how I was feeling. More to say about this later.


Hopefully Shan, Jenn, Sarah, Steph, and Julie will help me fill in and edit this first post with more information that I forgot.